My Rules for SOFT PLAY There are NO RULES

What Rules of soft play? RULES, WHAT RULES?
There are NO RULES...

I'm going to start this by saying; I am in no means a die hard fan of soft play.
Unfortunately my Children seem to LOVE going to these places?
SO these are my Rules of Soft Play :

  1. Leave your dignity at the door. You don't need that anymore.
  2. Take 'Back up' A friend, Their Dad Any one so you don't have to experience this by yourself! 
  3. Remember these Children have no mercy
  4. You will tell off at least one child... screw that you will shout at at least 5 children.
  5. These aren't Children. They are now wild animals.
  6. If necessary (It will be necessary) - Use your own Child as a protective shield.
  7. Its going to happen you will become the most judgemental parent EVER - "Why is that mum sitting drinking coffee, whilst her son is drowning in the ball pit?
  8. This is a War - Between Adults & Children 
  9. Tread with Caution - especially in the Ball pit. 
  10. EVACUATE - EVACUATE - Poo has been found in the Ball pit.
  11. Health & Safety completely OUT THE WINDOW 
  12. Remember Mums - It gets hot up the top of these areas. Make sure you have a top under your jumper No one wants to see a Nipple!
  13. Army must be easier than this.
  14. Soft play simply isn't made for parents *You'll hit your head more than once.
  15. There are NO RULES for Soft Play - Every Mother & Toddler for themselves 

We had a Horrific experience yesterday at a small Soft Play centre local to us.
You see the arrow pointing to that compartment under the slide? Yes? Well somehow. My Hugo, My 24 month old son got into it? Then a child (No Names) zipped the compartment up. My Hugo was then stuck. Screaming, Shaking a complete mess as (Said Child) wouldn't let him out... WHAT CHILD DOES THIS? (Said Child) was about 4 years old. With Ta-Da no parent in view... Where was his PARENTS?

Fuming!... I'm going to write to the Soft Play Centre... Why do they have a compartment that children can freely get into then get stuck? absolutely crazy.

My rules for soft play

Soft Play
No rules for soft play


  1. That photo of Emilyn is amazing!
    I never go to soft play without someone else, the boys love it but i just don't get the appeal! x

    1. Than you! she's a loony lol - good idea the thought of going on my own with the smalls terrifies me xxx



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